Reprint and add
A few months ago I noted with amusement
that most of the existing candidates had PECULIAR notions of the President's job. Only Trump seemed to conceive the job accurately as a Chief Executive. I rephrased those job descriptions in 1787 Constitutional terms.
Time to reprint the list and add one. Now we have
Jeb stating the job description as follows in modern terms:
"For the sake of our party and country, we must move to overcome the divisiveness and vulgarity Donald Trump has brought into the political arena, or we will certainly lose our chance to defeat the Democratic nominee and reverse President Obama’s failed policies,"
Okay, let's add this to the list.
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This is like one of those videogames with several alternate endings. Electing one of the above choices automatically alters the text of the Constitution as follows:
1: The President shall be Commander in Chief of the Army and Navy of the United States, and of the Militia of the several States, when called into the actual Service of the United States; he may require the Opinion, in writing, of the principal Officer in each of the executive Departments, upon any Subject relating to the Duties of their respective Offices, and he shall have Power to grant Reprieves and Pardons for Offences against the United States, except in Cases of Impeachment.
1: The President shall be a Non-Resigner of his Office in case that the Successor to the Presidency shall be, or appear to be, an adherent of the Mohammedan Religion.
Default Repoof Edition:
1: Benghazi. Benghazi. Benghazi. Benghazi. Benghazi.
Carson Edition redux:
1: The President shall be Superman in Chief, when called into Service by his X-ray Vision perceiving an armed Threat upon any School or University.
0x00000001h: The President shall write and enforce Laws and Regulations which absolutely prohibit Citizens from expressing their Opinions by means of Money; and shall thereby guarantee that only the Wealthiest Person in the Nation shall henceforward be qualified for the Office of President.
1: The President shall be a Father who is helplessly Weeping and Wailing and Gnashing his Teeth upon the recent Decedence of his Son. No duties can be required of such a tragic Figure.
Carson Edition reredux:
1: The President shall possess Opinions, and may be Elected by Voters who mistakenly believe that he intends to enact said Opinions; but he shall never take Actions which could possibly aid in the enforcement or enactment of said Opinions.
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1: The President shall be an Exquisitely Perfumed Eunuch who adores Fine Silks and Delicate Peruques; and shall offer a Wet Kiss to the deliciously Brutal Dark Invading Hordes streaming across our Southern Borders; and shall be a Connoisseur of the Fabulous Vintage Nectar contained in Sheldon Adelson's Noble and Refined Dick.