Friday, March 25, 2016
Man Inflames Tree
When you get those pesky old voices in your head, what to do? Climb a tree and stubbornly sit there? Or burn down a forest and part of a town? Oh dear, oh dear. Such a tough choice. Luther vs Lincoln. Hier steh ich vs Hiroshima.
The Seattle Man In Tree (now id'd as Cody Miller) took the Luther path. The Wenatchee Man Inflames Tree took the Lincoln path, or more precisely the Inslee path. Helping Our Dear Governor to vaporize the state.
Man Inflames Tree made one serious mistake. Burning down the state is called Honoring Gaia And Preserving Our Precious Planet when you are named Inslee. Burning down the state is just arson when you are not named Inslee. Man Inflames Tree is not Inslee, so he's just an arsonist. Should have checked first. "Am I named Inslee? No. Can't get away with it."
The article about Man Inflames Tree is unintentionally hilarious. Clunky writing....
The sheriff’s office says Jeremy J. Kendall, 37, was arrested Wednesday for first-degree arson in connection with the Sleepy Hollow Fire which started in late June. The fire burned 2,900 acres, destroyed 28 homes and several commercial buildings. According to probable cause documents, Kendall confessed to starting the fire. He also allegedly told the sheriff’s office the Department of Health was “somehow transmitting voices to his head and also controlling his body.” He allegedly told deputies the voices in his head and other factors were too much to deal with.Voices in his head and other factors. What other alleged factors belong in the same alleged category as alleged voices? Voices in his head and the alleged heartbreak of psoriasis. Voices in his head and allegedly tasteless nacho chips. Voices in his head and Trump chalkings. That must be it. Nothing else is so totally overpowering.
Labels: Carbon Cult
¶ 8:47 AM
