Friday, September 20, 2013
Talk like an ecopirate day
BRAVO PUTIN!
A ship full of Dutch ecopirates boarded and tried to sabotage a Russian oil-drilling platform.
How do ecopirates talk? Let's hear from Cap'n Kumi Naidoo. (Now there's a pirate name if ever I heard one!)
“Arrrrr! Avast ye scurvy rat Putin! Ye had best restrain your bilge-swillin Coast Guard. Ye be tellin them to holster their rusty muskets and walk the carbon-neutral recycled plank. Arrrrr!”Putin wasn't having any of it. His Coast Guard has towed the ecopirate vessel into Murmansk and arrested the Greenpeace pirates. What happens to them next is unknown, but shooting would be appropriate. Piracy has traditionally been a capital offense in civilized countries. Ecopiracy is piracy, fuckheads. Eat it. You are no different from Somali pirates. It doesn't matter if your motivation happens to be cooooooooooooooooooooooool among fashionable rich mass-murdering genocidal psychotics at the moment, while the Somali motivation is uncool among fashionable rich mass-murdering genocidal psychotics. You're still pirates. ¶ 3:40 AM
