Wednesday, April 24, 2013
Truly amazing
On the investigation of the supposed 'ricin letters', the FBI started out in default form.
= = = = =
Post-1989 FBI operating system:
All crimes are committed by Klansmen.
If a crime happens, find the nearest Klansman in pointy robe.
If you can't find a Klansman in pointy robe, find the nearest beefy pasty white Southerner.
If you can't find him, find the nearest white Christian.
= = = = =
On this event, their first suspect was bog-standard: an Elvis impersonator. Simply perfect stereotypical Southerner, As Seen On TV.
But after arresting him, they did something absolutely UNPRECEDENTED. They RELEASED HIM and stated explicitly that he is NOT THE SUSPECT.
This violates every rule in the Persecuting Attorney's Handbook, not just the FBI Handbook! No persecuting attorney ever fully releases a suspect. Never never never never never NEVER admit error! Even if all the evidence immediately points to someone else, even if the first suspect died a century before the crime was committed, the first suspect remains THE REAL CULPRIT until the end of the universe. The evidence is wrong, the jury is wrong, and the judge is wrong.
I'm glad I lived to see this day. It may be a one-off, but it's still a total departure from tyrannical norms in this miserable shit-eating excuse for a former country.
¶ 3:24 AM 
